OUZO

The US National Debt stands at 57.000 USD per citizen.
The Greek National Debt stands at 43.000 USD per citizen.
So what’s the big deal?
To who is this money owed?
Who is asking for it?
This stuff never gets paid back, it just melts under the sun.
When in need, just print more of it, create some inflation.
The only places without inflation, skid row and our cemeteries!

OZ

So these two friends of Dorothy’s came across one Caitlyn Jenner, and one said to the other ” Toto, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore!”

European Drama

 

Of all people, Greeks appear to be no Aristotelians

 

 

CASTING

STARLITE TALENT AGENTS CORP.

11000 WHITESHIT BOULEVARD

HORRORWOOD CA

 

CATTLE CALL

 

For a new police/detective CSI type action show, we seek talent that

 

-Must look 22 yrs old and not break up laughing when addressed as Doctor or Chief Pathologist

 

-Must have hair remaining in place come rain, shine, crashed, shot, burned, bombed, near drowned or whatever

 

-Must have characterless, photogenic facial features with the emotional depth of a frying pan

 

– No acting technique required, with the body language of a lumberjack, and please don’t stammer: Stanislavski was a Methodist

 

-Be able to state the understood over and over again, explaining the obvious to a counterpart who plays the apparently stupid expert

 

-Submit your résumé, including photograph and contact details if you think you have what it doesn’t take.

 

-Auditions are planned for early June.

 

-Remember our mission statement: The dumber the better: Good Luck

 

 

FORE!

 

 

 

So this call girl I know with a slight speech defect, joined a Golf Club to pick up some business.

 

And she didn’t do badly!

 

The first time she played a round, she scored a couple of Bars and three Fogeys.

 

DERISORY GIRL

I’ve never been so fucking happy in my life, existence too kind to me.

I went out to celebrate deep into the night. Everyone suspicious of me buying rounds:

who is this nutcase? But I just couldn’t help myself, wanting to share my joy, spreading it.

 

It is not often I get this privilege, the last one when WWII ended, the event of a lifetime,

a kind I and so many others pray for every day.

 

And thanks Media, thanks for breaking the news, for carrying the announcement,

for obeying your selfless inner-voice, distributing not only catastrophic but also glorious news.

 

The only cruelty in all of this is, having to wait 2 full hard years before becoming part of the epiphany.

 

I don’t know what I’m going to do till then, mope, starve, stamp, bang my head against the wall,

but I’ll try and remain courageous, as you must.

 

Barbra, Barbra, bar-bra, I know, modesty your name, but do you really have to wait till 2017

with your autobiography.

 

After all, there’s so very, very little to tell…

 

 

 

NOTHING CHANGES IN RUSSIA

The Russian has never done it, making sure he is always wronged.

(brutal, complex ridden, waving ICBMs, naturally)

So huge military parades an absolute must.

Putin, owner of primitive impulses, is addicted to pride, in fact he has it for sale,

a dealer, getting everyone at home hooked on it. Too bad he’s un-addicted to truth,

for on one end national pride is a convenient weapon, but on the other a tool of

manipulated tyranny over its own people, with disavowal often considered treason

and punishable by liquidation.

By the way, Mr Putin, Russia is not under any threat, NATO not there to attack

anyone, but invited in to protect small nations that for 60 years were forced to live

in your hell, and saying ‘Never Again’.

Is that so hard to understand? What would you do, had you been born in Warsaw or Prague?

Anyway, we all know that exaggerated patriotism is the expression of a fundamental lack of individual self-esteem.

And of course the last refuge of the scoundrel.

TEARS

Most of us get tears in our eyes when we listen to Rachmaninoff.

Putin, the poor, impoverished sop, gets tears in his eyes when a motorcycle gang drives by, with a large Russian flag on board.

Bon Appétit!

 

When read in Spanish the name of the Mamas & the Papas singing group, and why it was such a hit in Latin America, is the Tits & Potatoes.

 

 

 

Or Areolas & Chips.

 

 

A whole new concept in hash browns!

 

 

 

FIX!

 

Soccer is a game whereby a team has 11 players trying to put the ball into the other’s net, and Germany must win.

 

Dialectic Materialism is the philosophical investigation into the process of the opposing forces of reality, whereby the Communist Party stays on top.

 

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