Archive for February, 2009|Monthly archive page


The Dow Jones is a yardstick whereby you and I are told what the weather is like and how we feel or how we’re doing, by how many gamblers jump into a cab to the track each day. Ya’all also know how accurate and loyal these folks get, especially with Granny’s savings. There’s nothing like love for horses.

God-Given Perception

It’s very easy to predict the inevitable decline of so called Western Civilization. Oswald Spengler stating the obvious, saying one day everything mighty always shrinks. (My wife tends to agree!). Empires coming and going, but why always fadishly ‘The West’, and never beforehand other worlds. True, the narrow Ottoman, British and the more recent Soviet and Nazi empires came and went, but is modernity a nation, a system and all humanitarian progress therefore necessarily doomed? Or is raising the spectre of loss and decline and rallying the troops just another way of staying on top, when no distinction justifies particular privileges? You know, that smug, God-given, self-regarding thing. Now Oswald, go to sleep!

Just Married

Elmer Fudd’s Siegfried and Bugs Bunny’s Brühnhilde singing a Nibelungen segment together is nothing compared to a beaming Elmer Fudd (I’ll kill that wabbit), or else Yosemite Sam, wearing a disheveled morning suit, standing on the steps of a Cathedral with the smirking rabbit dressed in a lovely white wedding gown, hanging on to their arm, munching on a large carrot: now that is parody of life and philosophy of the first hour. The only one missing, Alice in Wonderbra…


Needless to say, my friend Eddy the dwarf only reads short stories!


There can be no matter without anti-matter, no electron not counter-balanced by a positron, no light without darkness which we simply wouldn’t recognize, no male without female and of course no life without death. But alas, there also can be no good without evil: a sad assessment of the immutable laws of the universe… And isn’t it ironic how, when there can be no life without opposites and no life without change, these laws themselves seem inalterable.

Booze (III)

In Spain, where some 4000 people get killed every year in serious traffic accidents, it turns out that 2700 of these perish under circumstances where not a drop of alcohol was involved. Meaning that 1300 die, because of alcohol. So now local experts have concluded that based on this statistical evidence it is 66% safer to drive when drunk. What a country!

Booze (II)

I knew it! Just read Arab chemists were to first to concoct cocktails. In fact the word alcohol comes from the arabic al-koh’l, it seems. But for some this was too much fun, and no sooner the substance forbidden or their society got completely ossified. An Algerian friend of mine bemoaned the fact that Arab society hasn’t produced anything of worth in a thousand years, when it used to lead the world. Well now, dear Kasim, here’s your answer. Part of it, anyway. Firstly, societies where denial of personal accountability is a national sport and the lie an accepted social norm, never advance. Secondly, that without hooch there would be no philosophy, democracy, comedy or tragedy, for the ancient Greeks were inveterate nippers. Without booze there would be no American independence as the founding fathers initially challenged the Empire well under the influence. Without tipple there would be no renaissance or industrial revolution as without the stuff of gin, beer or wine, the mind would have remained quite petrified, most ideas lost. And I do wonder about Averroes who must have had something to drink, for a short while instilling Aristotlean principles in Islam. Or Martin Luther and his reformation: it’s known he was as mad as a hatter, perhaps breaking the hold of Rome after inbibing a suitable amount of Schnapps? And what about those poor Aztecs, giving up the sauce for drinking blood, we all know what happened to them, don’t we? Yes, societies intolerant of social drink are doomed. But so are those who consider car-parks fields of honour, when entered with a Porsche.

Booze (I)

Just read man ceased to be nomadic after discovering that by boiling barley and letting it ferment he could have a hell of a good time drinking the result: beer. This was 12000 years ago, and it slowed him down not just because of producing the stuff which took a lot of time, but by not walking too steadily afterwards. It wasn’t the discovery and benefits of agriculture that made him more sedentary, as is commonly believed. But booze! Agriculture was initiated only some 6000 years ago and thus the positive influence of being under the influence sadly underrated, once more.


I’m neither of the Right nor of the Left, more of the Common Sense variety. If I had to start in politics I’d found The Horizontal Party, with someone like Upper Dorothy as Chair. But chauvinist, self-congratulatory broadcasts get under my skin. Like SCGS (Stewart & Colbert Glib Sanctimony) Inc: Mass murderer Lenin called Western protesters his useful idiots; predictably some critical applauders have found their way into this daily studio. It’s equally disturbing to see people make a comfortable living out of cloying moralism and still others making this the place where they get all their news to begin with. But then this has been going on for thousands of years, except they used to wear robes and the congregation kneeled. And mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the most decent of them all… is so much goodness ‘on the sleeve’ not much more than smug delusion? Evangelism shouldn’t pose as humour, this professional flaunting of decency on the cheap, followed by nothing but empty derision not even produced by the moderators themselves, but, apparently, by a gaggle of 20 writers and so ordered out, take-away indignation. Let’s face it, I don’t care much for people against war who foolishly imply that I’m for war by not subscribing to lunatic reasoning and bitingly inane, bought one-liners. I’m not, but I’m also very much against forest fires and mudslides, and strongly suggest you admire me for this. So now can I have my own TV show?

Newscast: In it’s sharpest rebuke of right-wing policies yet, The New York Times has endorsed Anthony Steyning, the anti-mudslide candidate

(The Daily most admired in opposing capitals)

Newscast: Anti-mudslide student demonstrations paralyze Columbia & Berkeley

(before heading for spring-break, in Dad’s SUV)

Newscast: Chomsky condemns American imperialism and mudslides

(direct from his Boston incubator)

Newscast: Attempts to stop mudslides sharply critized by Harold Pinter

(direct from Lady Antonia’s secure country estate)

-Newscast: Polls: Anti-Mudslidists Win by Landslide

(Planetary Warming charged with Sedition)

On Absurdity (1)

Today there was a terrible air crash in Spain. Some 150 people, including 20 children instantly carbonized. I maintain in all my writing that in a cosmic sense there cannot be life without death but that life with death as reward is still far from absurd, not even when the end of one often is. With this I mean when a life is utterly wasted or the profound pain in the premature taken away of one. What ìs incongruous also is the banality in asking your wife if she would like one or two lumps of sugar in her tea, when a couple of hundred miles away and at that precise moment all those innocents are destroyed in a matter of seconds. That is intimidating. Making one afraid of opening one’s mouth, of having tea, crying out for those precious lives. And angry over the magnificence of life getting besmirched by the execrable, cruel manner of circumstance, accountable to no one it seems. (Aug20/08)

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