Archive for the ‘Future’ Category

God Save America

Me and my fellow murderers, psychopaths, hate mongers,

deranged fantasists and obscene attention seekers able to count

on self-fulfilling media coverage, wish to thank the NRA for their

unwavering support, allowing us to live our dreams and defend

ourselves against despicable monsters like fellow students, toddlers,

Catholics, Jews, Blacks, Latinos, or in general people with an accent,

or people who are brighter, work harder, have more success, and all

those others whose face we cannot stand.

 

Because the NRA understands that the gun is our brain, just like it is theirs,

especially the semi-automatic one. And that no regulation will stop us, for as

long as we can just borrow one, except when the oppressor cleverly bans

not the gun, but the bullet. In which case I guarantee you bullet trafficking will

outdo drug trafficking within months.

 

With the NRA’s unconditional support we have averaged the elimination of

30.000 enemies a year, over the past decade. But with help and devotion

there is no reason we cannot vastly improve on this number.

 

So God bless the morally corrupt and certifiably insane, because we have

what it takes.

 

Testimonial signed and agreed on between

 

Anthony Steyning & pals

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My son has designed an app for dogs with a Google map flagging parks and hydrants in town.

 

Horses please abstain!

 

Black Sea

Russians are crude operators, with a firm 19th century mind-set in everything, and going about it in their predictable way. Ukrainians aren’t much better though and their claim on Crimea is just as tenuous. Still, revising Ukraine’s borders and, given its ethnic make-up, turning the Crimea into a semi-independent type of crown colony whose existence is guaranteed by both regional masters, would be the best compromise.

 

For peace, for business, for native Tatars, for the Russian fleet, for saving everyone’s face and the Ukraine suddenly having less of a domestic problem eventually joining the EU.

 

I think Ukraine should cede first, pacifying big, ugly brother, and guaranteeing its own and their cherished EU’s natural gas supply at decent rates.

 

 

So that despite the uncertainties in Kiev, it’s where the solution lies or what’ll be?

 

Astute pragmatism or self-defeating pride?

 

 

Rivalry

So Mrs Christie, if I’m not indiscreet, who goes on top?

Oh, that’s a weighty question. In all honesty I would have to admit… Hillary!

Hillary on top? Really…

Of course, that’s if Chris gets the nomination…

Coming from behind?

He’s done this all his life…

So he never pulled ahead?

I always bent over forward for him. Which helped…

How did Chris and Hillary meet?

During a debate!

One that didn’t take long…

I watched it, I knew the ending…

But did Hillary? Ending up on the short one again?

Not yet, but I could see it coming…

And you didn’t mind?

I stand behind my man, through thick and through thin…

But mainly thick?

They say, behind every successful man stands an incredulous woman. Not me!

Well, Mrs Christie, we hope for your sake, that he pulls it off.

I’d be on top…

Of the world?

Damn right! After years of carrying this load!

 

A Piece of the Peace

The Norwegian branch of the Nobel Foundation has already announced the winner of the 2013 Peace Prize and it is AMTRAK for contributing to world peace by delivering so many people to so many sleepy holes in the wall.

 

Download Anthony Steyning’s new E-Novel: A Kiss by the Clowns

The Death Of Certainty

The problem with fervent believers is they emulate the wrong God.

 

Either this or they mistake His identity.

 

Ramadan is when more Muslims kill more Muslims, constantly, massively, in an organised way, from Pakistan to Iraq and from Syria to Libya, than anybody else. Yet demand from the rest of us… that we respect them.

 

As for the others, if there were a Messiah and he was to come back, he would probably be considered a deeply suspicious character, and get shot a thousand times over.

 

So that Allah and Jehovah better stay home, they’re better off where they are, and leave self-righteous punishment to mankind, being so very, very good at it.

 

Though the smart at least entertain some doubts, when the primitives remain forever certain of what they’re doing: killing usually the easy way forward.

 

But forward, exactly…. where to?

 

And once the gods finally turn their back on all men, does doubt not mean life at last?

 

The best of all deals, probably?

 

Download Anthony Steyning’s terrific new E-Novel: A Kiss by the Clowns

Get a Life

The Monarchy is for nostalgiques and parasites, to the impartial observer Royalty a bit like mobile, talking furniture.

 

If by some miracle its members not already stupid, they’re so corrupted by their own uselessness that by the time they’re forty, they’ll have turned this way.

 

The stultifying round of meaningless duties does this to people so positioned: accepting it a pathetic addiction to suffocating, stylized mediocrity.

 

Download Anthony Steyning’s amazing E-Novel: A Kiss by the Clowns

Time Out!

I’m throwing in the towel for a while, I’m much too busy with my other writing.

 

You can check out my www.anthonysteyning.com , it changes constantly!

 

Also see my books on sale at Arts & Letters Daily:  www.aldaily.com , it’s where it’s happening.

 

Et pour mes amis Français: bonne chance avec le père Hollande: désolé, il n’a pas la solution!

Moolah!

Money is a nomad, in recent years turned hermit, it seems!

 

Download Anthony Steyning’s terrific new E-Novel: A Kiss by the Clowns 

Kirchner (I)

Last week President Cristina Kirchner made it known in all seriousness that she is nationalising a key local branch of the Spanish REPSOL oil company, YPF, as Argentina’s pay back to Spain for the conquistadores having stolen all its gold and silver, centuries ago.

 

The problem with this incongruous, somewhat infantine excuse is that Mrs Fernandez de Kirchner descends from the very, subsequent settlers not also merely stealing gold and silver from local tribes, but massacring them, taking the whole bloody country as it were, by way of massive genocide.

 

 So to be morally consistent and to show theft is not in her blood, she should now also start Argentinian devolution to the few remaining native Toba and Mapuche Indians, today subsisting under cruel conditions.

 

Whereupon the Mohawks can re-take Manhattan, all Anglo-Saxons get thrown out of England and Astérix re-grabs his chunk of Roman Empire.

 

Download Anthony Steyning’s E-Novel of international intrigue: A Kiss by the Clowns

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